Dale | Ya know. There�s been a heap of legends and tall tales about Robin Hood, all different too. Well, we folks of the animal kingdom have our own version. It�s the story of what really happened in Sherwood Forest. Alan starts whistling meanwhile in the screen all the actors are going be introduced Incidentally, I�m Allan-A-Dale, a minstrel. That�s an early folk singer, and my job is to tell it like it is... or was... or whatever... Robin Hood and Little John Walkin� through the forest Laughin� back and forth at what the Other�ne has to say Reminiscin� this �n that �n havin� Such a good time Oo-de-lally, hoo-de-lally, golly What a day! Never ever thinkin� there was Danger in the water They were drinkin�, they just Guzzled it down Never dreamin� that a schemin� Sheriff and his posse Was a watchin� them and Gatherin� around Robin Hood and Little John Runnin� through the forest Jumpin� fences, dodgin� trees And tryin� to get away Contemplatin� nothin� but escape And fin�ly makin� it Oo-de-lally, hoo-de-lally, golly What a day! Oo-de-lally, hoo-de-lally, golly What a day! |
Little John | You know somethin�, Robin? You�re taking too many chances. |
Robin Hood | Chances! You must be joking! That was just a bit of a lark Little John. |
Little John | Yeah? Take a look at your hat. Robin finds an arrow has impaled it That�s not a candle on a cake. |
Robin Hood | Hello, this one almost had my name on it, didn�t it? They�re getting better, you know. You�ve got to admit it, they are getting better. |
Little John | Uh, yeah. The next time, that sheriff will probably have a rope around our necks. Ugh! Pretty hard to laugh hanging there, Rob. |
Robin Hood | The Sheriff and his whole posse couldn�t lift you off the ground, and en garde! He throws the arrow to Little John |
Little John | Hey watch out Rob, that�s the only hat I�ve got. |
Robin Hood | Oh, come along. You worry too much old boy. |
Little John | You know something, Robin? I was just wondering, are we good guys or bad guys? You know, I mean, out robbing the rich to feed the poor� |
Robin Hood | Rob? That�s a naughty word. We never rob; we just sort of borrow a bit from those who can afford it. |
Little John | Borrow! Boy, are we in debt. |
Bugle sounds | |
Robin Hood | Ha, ha. That sounds like another collection day for the poor, eh, Johnny boy? |
Little John | Yeah. Sweet charity! |
It�s the royal entourage, and Prince John is in the carriage. With him is his chief adviser, Sir Hiss. Between the two of them they have put a heavy burden of taxes on the poor people. They are making their way through Sherwood Forest on the way to Nottingham to tax the people there | |
Prince John | Taxes! Taxes! Beautiful, lovely taxes! Aha! Aha! |
Sir Hiss | Sire, you have an absolute skill for encouraging contributions from the poor. |
Prince John | To coin a phrase dear counsellor, rob the poor to feed the rich Am I right? Tell me, what�s the next stop, sir Hiss? |
Sir Hiss | Let me see� Reading a map Ooh. The next stop is Nottingham, Sire. |
Prince John | Oh, the richest plum of them all. Notting-ha-ha-ham the crown is too big for his head |
Sir Hiss | A perfect fit, Sire. Most becoming. You look regal, dignified, sincere, masterful, noble, chivalry� |
Prince John | Don�t overdo it, Hiss. There. That, I believe, does it. This crown gives me a feeling of power. Power! Forgive me a cruel chuckle. Ha, ha, ha, ha! Power, mmm. |
Sir Hiss | How well King Richard�s crown sits on your noble brow |
Prince John | Doesn�t it? Angrily King Richard? I�ve told you never to mention my brother�s name! |
Sir Hiss | A mere slip of the forked tongue, Majesty. We�re in this plot together, if you don�t mind my saying so, and remember it was your idea I hypnotized him� |
Prince John | I know, and sent him off on that crazy crusade. Ha, ha, ha, ha. |
Sir Hiss | Much to the sorrow of the Queen Mother. |
Prince John | crying Mother! Mother always did like Richard best he sucks one of his fingers while with the other hand takes the ear |
Sir Hiss | Your Highness, please, don�t do that. If you don�t mind my saying so, you see, you have a very loud thumb. Hypnotism can rid you of your psychosis-s-s -s-s-o-o-o-o- e-e-easily. |
Prince John | No! None of that! |
Sir Hiss | I was only trying to help. |
Prince John | I wonder. Silly serpent. |
Sir Hiss | Silly serpent? |
Prince John | Look here. One more, one more hiss out of you�uhh� Hiss, and you are walking to Nottingham. |
Sir Hiss | to himself Snakes don�t walk. They slither. Humph, so there. |
Robin and Little John quickly slipped into disguises as gypsies fortune tellers and run ahead to the side of the road | |
Little John | What a bad luck. It�s only a circus. A peanut operation. |
Robin Hood | Peanuts, says you? Dunce, that�s the royal coach! It�s Prince John himself. |
Little John | The Prince? Wait a minute! There�s a law against robbing royalty. I�ll catch you later. |
Robin Hood | What? And miss this chance to perform before royalty? |
Little John | Ah! Here we go again. |
Prince John stops his convoy and permits Robin Hood and Little John to kiss his hands, during which process large quantities of finger-jewellery disappear. Sir Hiss spots this, but the King silences his protests. | |
Robin Hood | Oo-da-lolly, oo-da-lolly! Fortune tellers! |
Little John | Fortunes forecast! Lucky charms! |
Robin Hood | Get the dope with your horoscope! |
Prince John | Fortune tellers! How droll! Stop the coach. |
Sir Hiss | Sire, Sire, they may be bandits. |
Prince John | Oh, poppycock. Female bandits? What next? Rubbish! To Robin and Little John disguised as gypsies My dear ladies, you have my permission to kiss the royal hands� whichever you like, first Robin and Little John see only the jewels in them |
Robin Hood | Mmm. Oh how gracious! And generous he steals one of the rings |
Sir Hiss | Sire, sire, did you see what they� |
Prince John | Stop hissing in my ear. Meanwhile Little John kiss the other hand and takes with him the jewels |
Sir Hiss | G-g-g-gee� |
Prince John | Aah! Hiss! Oh, you�ve hissed your last� hiss. Suspicious snake. |
Robin Hood | Masterfully done, Your Excellency. Now close your eyes and concentrate. Close your eyes. Tight shut. No peeking, Sire. Ooh! From the mists of time, come forth, spirits. Yoo-hoo! |
Little John | outside Little John is preparing the trick of the crystal ball Ok, little fireflies. Glow, babies, glow! |
Robin Hood | We�re waiting! Ahh-ohh! Look Sire. Look. |
Prince John | Ah! Incredible! Floating spirits! |
Robin Hood | Ah. Oh�naughty, naughty. You mustn�t touch. |
Prince John | Oh, you struck the royal hand. |
Robin Hood | Shhh! You�ll break the spell. Gaze into the crystal ball. Oo-da-lolly. Oo-da-lolly... Oh! A face appears... A crown is on his noble brow. |
Prince John | Oo-da-lolly he sees himself A crown! How exciting! |
Robin Hood | His face is handsome, regal, majestic� lovable, a cuddly face. |
Prince John | Handsome, regal, majestic�lovable. Yes, yes. Cuddly. Ha ha ha. That�s me to a �T�, clearly is. And then, Robin tries to catch one of the taxes bags, but Sir Hiss stops him |
Robin Hood | Ooh! Uh� |
Prince John | Now what? |
Robin Hood | chuckling Why, uh� I see, um� your illustrious name� |
Prince John | I know my name! Get on with it! |
Robin Hood | Your name will go down� down� down� He tries to get out Sir Hiss� tail the money bag in history, of course. |
Prince John | I knew it! You hear that, Hiss? Oh you can�t� He�s in the basket. Don�t forget it. |
Outside, Little John sees that the wheels� hub caps are made of gold� | |
Little John | Hmm. What have we here? Solid gold hub caps. He robs them Oo-da-lolly. The jackpot! He makes a hole in the bottom of the box and all the coins are putting in his dress. But when Robin and Little John run away in different ways they bump |
Prince John | Robbed! I�ve been robbed! Hiss, you�re never around when I need you! Sir Hiss goes out of the basket I�ve been robbed. |
Sir Hiss | Of course you�ve been robbed |
Robin Hood | Oo-da-lolly! Oo-da-lolly! |
Little John | Fortunes forecast. Lucky charms. |
Prince John | After them, you fools! The entourage run after them, but the wheels have been robbed also, and Prince John falls on the ground No, no, no, no! |
Sir Hiss | I knew it, I knew it! I just knew this would happen. I warned you, but you wouldn�t listen. Ah, ah, ah. Seeing that Prince John is going to use the mirror he tries to warn him seven years bad� He breaks the mirror on Sir Hiss� head luck. That�s what it is. Besides, you broke your mother�s mirror. |
Prince John | Ohh, Mommy! He sucks his thumb as a baby I�ve got a dirty thumb. |
Nottingham. Prince John was furious upon discovering that he had been tricked, and when he arrived at Nottingham he wanted revenge. Rewards were posted for the capture of the thieves, but of course, the pair remained free. | |
Allan-A-Dale | Well even Prince John offered a reward for the capture of Robin Hood that sure rogue kept on robbing the rich to feed the poor, and blame me if it�s a good thing he did, �cause the taxes on all the poor folks of Nottingham were starving to death. Uh-oh. Here comes old bad news himself� the Honourable Sheriff of Nottingham. |
Sheriff | Every town Has its taxes too And the taxes is due Doo dee doo doo doo Well, lookie there. Friar Tuck, the old do-gooder. He�s out doing good again. |
Otto | Well, good morning, Friar Tuck. |
Friar Tuck | Shhhh. For you, Otto, from Robin Hood. |
Otto | Oh, God bless Robin Hood. |
Sheriff | Doo da doo doo doo knocking the door |
Friar Tuck | It�s the Sheriff! Hurry. Hide it, quick! |
Sheriff | Here I come, ready or not! Well, greetings from your friendly neighbourhood tax collector |
Otto | Oh, take it easy on me Sheriff. What with this busted leg, you know, I-I�m way behind in me work, Sheriff. |
Sheriff | I know, but you�re way behind with your taxes too. |
Friar Tuck | OH, have a heart, Sheriff! Can�t you see he�s laid up? Come on, Otto, it�s better sit down and rest. |
Otto | Oh thank you again while he walks we can hear coins jingling |
Sheriff | Let me give you a hand with that leg. Oh. Upsy-daisy. Bingo! What they won�t think of next he hits the foot |
Otto | Ooooh! Ooooh! |
Sheriff | It smarts, don�t it? I know, but Prince John says taxes should hurt. |
Friar Tuck | Now see here, you-you evil, flint hearted--- |
Sheriff | Now, now, now. Save your sermon, preacher. It ain�t Sunday, you know. Doo da doo doo doo They call me a slob But I do my job Doo da doo doo doo |
He arrives at Rabbit�s home, where they are in a birthday party | |
Rabbits | Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday dear Skippy He receives his gift |
Sheriff | Happy birthday to you. Well, sonny, that box is done up right pretty, ain�t it? |
Skippy | Well, Mr. Sheriff, sir, it�s my birthday present, sir. |
Sheriff | It sure is. Why, don�t you open it? |
Skippy | Oh boy! One whole farthing! The Sheriff takes it first |
Mother Rabbit | Have you no heart? We all scrimped and saved to give it to him. |
Sheriff | Now, that�s mighty thoughty of you, wider-woman. The family that saves together, pays together. Skippy is crying Oh now, don�t take it so hard, sonny. Prince John wishes you a happy birthday too. |
A blind beggar appears at the home begging for alms | |
Robin Hood | as a blind Alms, alms, alms for the poor |
Sheriff | Hmmm. Well�. The Sheriff swipes his meagre collection too So far, it�s been a cheerful morning. Keep saving! |
Mother Rabbit | What a dirty trick! You poor old man. Do come in. Come in and rest yourself. |
Robin Hood | Thank you kindly, mother. Thank you. Tell me now, did me old ears hear someone singing a birthday ditty? |
Skippy | crying Yes sir. And that mean old Sheriff took my birthday present. |
Robin Hood | There, there, now. Be a stout hearted lad. Don�t let it get you down the beggar reveals himself as Robin hood, and gives Skippy a bow-and-arrow and a Robin Hood hat for his birthday |
Skippy | Gee! It�s Robin Hood! |
Robin Hood | Happy birthday son! |
Sis | Oh, he�s so handsome. Just like his reward posters. |
Robin Hood | Tell me young man, how old are you today? |
Skippy | Gosh! I�m seven years old going to eight. |
Robin Hood | Seven? Well, that makes you man of the house, and I�ve got just the right present for you, |
Skippy | For me? Gee, thanks, Mr. Robin Hood, sir. Hey, how do I look? |
Tagalong | Not much like Mr. Robin Hood. |
Robin Hood | She�s right. There is something missing. Of course! There you go. |
Skippy | Oh boy! Now how do I look? |
Sis | laughing The hat�s too big. |
Mother Rabbit | Shhh. Mind your manners. |
Tagalong | imitating her mother Yes. Mind your mattles. |
Robin Hood | Ha, ha. Don�t worry. You�ll grow into it, young man. |
Skippy | I�m going to try it out. |
Tagalong | Goodbye Mr. Robin Hood. Come again, on my birthday. |
Mother Rabbit | Oh, you have made his birthday a wonderful one. How can I ever thank you? |
Robin Hood | I wish I could do more, he gives her a bag of money on general principles. Here. Now keep your chin up. Someday there�ll be happiness again in Nottingham. You�ll see. |
Mother Rabbit | Robin Hood, you risk so much to keep our hopes alive. Bless you, bless you. |
A bunch of kids -Skippy, Toby Turtle, Sis and Tagalong- are getting off to play with the bow-and-arrow. Skippy fires the arrow and it lands in the grounds of Nottingham Castle where Maid Marian and Lady Kluck are playing badminton. | |
Toby | Gee, Robin Hood really gave it to you? |
Skippy | Yeah, and he gave me his hat too. |
Toby | His hat too! May I shoot your bow? |
Tagalong | Let me try Skippy. |
Skippy | Oh no, you�re not, I�m shooting it first. |
Sis | Your pointing too high. |
Skippy | I�m not either. Watch this. |
Toby | Oh, oh. Now you done it. |
Sis | Right in Prince John�s backyard. |
Tagalong | Skippy you can�t go in there. |
Toby | Yeah. Prince John will chop off your head. Like this. |
Skippy | I don�t care. I gotta get my arrow. |
Sis | Wait a minute. Toby might tattle on you. |
Skippy | Yeah, Toby you got to take the oath. |
Toby | An oath? |
Tagalong | Put your hand on your heart and cross your eyes. |
Skippy | Spiders, snakes and a lizard�s head� |
Toby | Spiders, snakes and a lizard�s head� |
Skippy | If I tattle-tale, I�ll die till I�m dead. |
Toby | If I tattle-tale, I�ll die till I�m dead. |
Lady Kluck | Now it�s your turn to serve, Marian dear. |
Maid Marian | Are you ready Lady Kluck? |
Lady Kluck | Oh, as your lady in waiting, I�m waiting. Ho, ho, ho. I�m getting too old for this. |
Maid Marian | Oh, Klucky that was a good shoot. |
Lady Kluck | Not bad yourself, dear. Oh, my girdle�s killing me |
Maid Marian | Where is it? |
Lady Kluck | It must be in there someplace. |
Maid Marian | Oh, Klucky you look so silly. Oh, look. There it is, behind you. Oh! She faces to Skippy Well, hello. Skippy is petrified Where did you come from? |
Skippy | Please, don�t tell Prince John. Mama said he�ll chop off my head. |
Maid Marian | Oh, don�t be afraid. You�re doing nothing wrong. |
Lady Kluck | Oh Marian, what a bonny wee bunny. |
Maid Marian | Who does this young archer remind you of? |
Lady Kluck | Oh! Well, upon my word! The notorious Robin Hood! |
Maid Marian | That�s right. Only Robin Hood wears a hat like that. |
Skippy | more confident now Look at this keen Robin Hood bow. |
Tagalong | Ah-choo! |
Lady Kluck | joking Oh, Marian, don�t look around, but I do believe we�re surrounded. Oh mercy! |
Sis | He snitched on us. |
Maid Marian | It�s all right children. Don�t be afraid, Come here. |
Toby | to Sis Do you think it�s safe? |
Tagalong | That�s Maid Marian. |
Sis | Mama said she�s awful nice. Come on. |
Tagalong | Hey you guys. Not so fast. Wait for me. |
Sis | I told Skippy was shooting too high. |
Maid Marian | I�m so very glad he did. Now I get to meet all of you. |
Tagalong | Gee, you�re very beautiful. |
Sis | Are you gonna marry Robin Hood? |
Tagalong | Mama says you and Robin Hood are sweethearts. |
Maid Marian | Well� um�, you see, that was several years ago before I left for London |
Toby | Did he ever kiss you? |
Maid Marian | Well no, but he carved our initials on this tree. I remember it so well. |
Skippy | You are going to have any kids? |
Tagalong | My mum has some kids. |
Maid Marian | Oh, he�s probably forgotten all about me |
Skippy | Oh not Robin Hood. I�ll bet he�ll storm the castle, fight the guards, rescue you and drag you off to Surest Forest. |
Lady Kluck | Now, just a moment there, young man. You�ve forgotten Prince John. |
Skippy | Prince John don�t scare me none. |
Toby | I�m scared of Prince John. He�s cranky. |
Lady Kluck | Heh, heh, heh using her racket as a sword I, Prince John, challenge you to a duel! Hey, hey Take that, and that, and this. |
Skippy | Death to tyrants! |
Lady Kluck | Ach! Ach! Ach! �running for her live� |
Sis | Slice him to pieces! |
Maid Marian | Oh, save me, my hero! Save me! |
Lady Kluck | Oh! Ouch! That�s not fair! Mommy! She sucks her thumb as Prince John does |
Sis | That�s Prince John all right. |
Skippy | Yahoo! Now I got you! |
Lady Kluck | Ach. Mercy, mercy. She takes the wooden sword and acts as if she was bounded Ugh. He got me. I�m dying. |
Skippy | worried Did I hurt you, huh? |
Lady Kluck | No, this is the part where you drag your lady fair off the Sherwood Forest. |
Skippy | Come on lady fair, let�s go. |
Maid Marian | Oh, Robin! You�re so brave and impetuous. Oh, so this is Sherwood Forest. |
Skippy | Yeah, I guess so. And now what will we do? |
Maid Marian | Well, usually, the hero gives his lady a kiss. |
Skippy | A kiss? Oh, that�s sissy stuff. |
Maid Marian | Well if you won�t then I will. |
Sis | They�re kissing Ha, ha, ha. Laughing Ah� |
Maid Marian�s room. She is truly yearning for Robin Hood. | |
Lady Kluck | Ah me. Young love. Oh it�s a grand thing. |
Maid Marian | Oh Klucky, surely he�s not known how much I still love him. |
Lady Kluck | But of course, my dear. Believe me, someday soon your uncle King Richard will have an outlaw for an in-law. |
Maid Marian | laughing Oh Klucky, but when?, when? |
Lady Kluck | Patience, my dear, patience. Remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder. |
Maid Marian | sadly Or forgetful. Oh, I�ve been away so long. What if he�s forgotten all about me? |
Sherwood Forest. Robin Hood is cooking the meal, dreaming about her� | |
Robin Hood | La, da, di, da, da, da, di, da, dum Da, da, hm, hm, hm, hm |
Little John | Hey lover boy, how�s that grub coming? Man I�m starved. |
Robin Hood | Hm, hm, hm, da, da, dee |
Little John | Rob? |
Robin Hood | Hm, hm, hm |
Little John | Robin? |
Robin Hood | Hm, hm, hm |
Little John | Robaire. Hey! |
Robin Hood | What? What do you say? |
Little John | Ah forget it. Your mind�s not on food. You�re thinking about somebody with long eyelashes. You�re smelling that sweet perfume. |
Robin Hood | Hey, whoa, it�s boiling over. |
Little John | You�re burning the chow! |
Robin Hood | Sorry, Johnny. I was thinking about Maid Marian again. I can�t help it. I love her Johnny. |
Little John | Hey look, why don�t you stop mooning and moping around? Just marry the girl. |
Robin Hood | Marry her? You don�t just walk up to a girl under a bookcase and say, �Remember me? We were kids together, will you marry me�? No it isn�t just done that way. |
Little John | Oh, come on Robby. Climb the castle walls. Sweep her off her feet. Carry her off in style. |
Robin Hood | It�s no use Johnny. As I told you it just wouldn�t work. Besides, what can I offer her? |
Little John | Well, for one, you can�t cook. |
Robin Hood | I�m serious. She�s a high born lady of quality. |
Little John | So she�s got class, So what? |
Robin Hood | I�m an outlaw. That�s what. That�s no life for a lovely lady, always on the run. What kind of a future is that? |
Friar Tuck | For heaven�s sake, son. You�re not an outlaw. Why, someday you�ll be called a great hero. |
Robin Hood | A hero? Do you hear that Johnny? We�ve just been pardoned. |
Little John | Ho, ho, that�s a gas. We ain�t been arrested yet. |
Friar Tuck | All right. Laugh you rogues, but there�s going to be a big to-do in Nottingham He tastes the �food� Well-done, ain�t it? Old Prince John�s having a championship archery tournament tomorrow. |
Little John | Archery tournament? Rob could win that standing on his head, eh Rob? |
Robin Hood | Thank you Little John, but I�m sure we�re not invited. |
Friar Tuck | No, but there�s somebody who�ll be very disappointed if you don�t come. |
Little John | Yeah. Old Bushel Britches--- the Honourable Sheriff of Nottingham. |
Friar Tuck | No. to Robin Maid Marian. |
Robin Hood | Maid Marian? |
Friar Tuck | Yeah. She�s going to give a kiss to the winner. |
Robin Hood | A kiss to the winner? Oo-de-lolly! Come on Johnny! What are we waiting for? |
Little John | Wait a minute, Rob. That place will be crawling with soldiers. |
Robin Hood | Aha! But remember, faint hearts never won fair lady. Fear not my friends. This will be my greatest performance. |
Nottingham. Archery performance�s day. The archery tournament is a plot. Sir Hiss is intent on catching Robin Hood. The very best archers of England had come to this shooting match and they gathered in the great tent, inspecting their bows and arrows and talking of the good shots they had made in their day. | |
Prince John | Hiss, this is a red-letter day. A �coup d�etat� to coin a Norman phrase. |
Sir Hiss | Yes, indeed, Sire. Your plan to capture Robin Hood in public is sheer genius. Hoo, hoo, hoo! |
Prince John | Hiss, no one sits higher than the King. Must I remind you, Hiss? Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. |
Sir Hiss | Do forgive me. I didn�t mean� |
Prince John | My trap is baited and set. And then, revenge! Ah, revenge! |
Sir Hiss | Shhh. Not so loud, Sire. Remember, only you and I know, and your s-s-secret is my s-s-secret. |
Prince John | Stop hissing in my ear. Secret? What secret? |
Sir Hiss | The capture of Robin Hood, Sire. |
Prince John | That insolent blackguard. Ooh! I�ll show him who wears the Crown. |
Sir Hiss | I share your loathing, Sire. That scoundrel fooled you with that silly disguise, then robbed you, making you look utterly ridiculous. |
Prince John | Enough! Hiss, you deliberately dodged. |
Sir Hiss | But, but--- but Sire� please. |
Prince John | Stop snivelling and hold still. |
Sir Hiss | Thank you Sire. |
Maid Marian | Klucky I�m so excited. But how will I recognize him? |
Lady Kluck | Uh, he�ll let you know somehow. That young rogue is full of surprises, my dear. |
Robin Hood | There she is, Little John. Isn�t she beautiful? |
Little John | Cool it, lover boy. Your heart�s running away with your head. |
Robin Hood | Oh stop worrying. This disguise would fool my own mother. |
Little John | Aha, but your mom ain�t here. You got to fool old Bushel Britches. |
Robin Hood | Sheriff, Your Honour. Meetin� you face to face is a real treat. A real treat. |
Sheriff | Well, now thank you. Oh excuse me. I gotta go win this tournament. |
Little John | Hey, Rob�s not a bad actor, but wait till he sees this scene. I lay on Prince John. Ah�.me Lord, my esteemed Royal Sovereign of the Realm, the head man himself, you�re beautiful. |
Prince John | Ha, ha. He has style, eh, Hiss? �Du savoir faire il y a n�est ce pas�, Hiss? |
Little John | Took the words from my mouth, P.J. |
Prince John | P.J.! I like that. You know I do. Hiss, put it on my luggage. P.J. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! P.J., yes. |
Sir Hiss | Humph! And you, who might you be, sir? |
Little John | I am Sir Reginald, Duke of Chutney. And don�t stick your tongue out at me, kid. And now, Your Mightiness, allow me to lay some protocol on you he�s going to kiss his hand but� |
Prince John | Oh, no. Forgive me, but I lose more jewels that way. Please, sit down. |
Little John | Thanks P.J. Nothing better than the royal box. Oh, hey! Hey, what�s this? Oh, excuse me buster |
Sir Hiss | Buster? You, sir, have taken my seat. |
Prince John | Hiss, with you around, who needs a court jester? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Now get out there and sep your snake eyes open for you-know-who. |
Sir Hiss | You--- you mean I--- I�m being dismissed? |
Little John | You heard his Mightiness. Move it, creepy. Get lost. Be gone, long one. |
Sir Hiss | What cheek! Creepy. Buster. Long one! Who�s that duke think he is? |
Allan-A-Dale | He�s up to something. |
Friar Tuck | Yeah. Come on. |
Sir Hiss buys a balloon and floats skyward attached to it. Friar Tuck shoots Sir Hiss out of the skies by firing an arrow from a mandolin-string and stuffs him into a beer-barrel. | |
Robin Hood | Ah, Your Ladyship. I beg your pardon; it�s a great honour to shoot for the favour of a lovely lady like yourself. Hope I win the kiss. |
Maid Marian | Oh! Well, thank you my thin-legged archer. I wish you luck whispering with all my heart. |
Sir Hiss | Hmmmm. I wonder� |
Crocodile | Your Highness, with your Royal permission, we�re ready to begin. |
Prince John | Proceed, Captain. |
Crocodile | The Tournament of the Golden Arrow will now begin. |
The archers start shooting; among them there�s Toby�s father. | |
Toby | Yay, dad. |
People | When the Sheriff shoots�. Boo! Boo! Boo! And when the Stork -i.e. Robin- shoots� Yay! Yay! Yay! |
Prince John | A perfect bull�s-eye! Well, well. |
Little John | That�s what you call pulling it back and letting it go, P.J. |
Robin Hood | I�m gonna win that golden arrow and present myself to the lovely Maid Marian� |
Sheriff | Listen Scissorsbill, if you shoot as good as you blabbermouth you�re better than Robin Hood. |
Robin Hood | Robin Hood, he says! Wow-wee! I�m tiptop, all right but I�m not as good as he is. |
Little John | Ha, ha! That kid�s got class, ain�t he, P.J.? |
Prince John | Indeed, he has, Reggie. Ha, ha! Bravo! Bravo! Yes. |
Robin Hood | Oh� by the way, I hear you�re having a little bit trouble getting your hands on that Robin Hood. |
Sheriff | He�s scared of me. Now I told you. He didn�t show up here today. I can spot him through them phoney disguises. |
Sir Hiss | It�s him! It�s Robin Hood! I can�t wait till I tell His Majesty. Unhand me, you�. Please, please, I don�t drink. |
Crocodile | Attention everyone. The final contestants are� the Honourable Sheriff of Nottingham� |
People | Boo! Boo! Boo! |
Crocodile | and the spindle-legged stork from Devonshire. |
People | Yay! Yay! Yay! |
Prince John | My dear, I suspect you favour the gangly youth. Hm? |
Maid Marian | Me? Uh� Why, yes Sire. Well, at least he amuses me. |
Prince John | Coincidentally, my dear young lady, he amuses me, too. Ha, ha, ha, ha. |
Crocodile | For the final shootout, move the target back 30 paces. |
Sheriff | You heard him, Nutsy. Keep going. Move it, you birdbrain whispering And remember what you�re supposed to do. |
Nutsy | Yes sir, Sheriff, sir. When the Sheriff shoots he jumps and the arrow is in the target�s centre |
People | Boo! Boo! Boo! |
Sheriff | Well, that shot wins the golden arrow, the kiss and the whole caboodle Although the Sheriff tries to fiddle the Stork, he fails� |
People | Yay! Yay! Yay! |
Prince John makes a signal to the Captain and when the Stork goes confidentially up to the royal platform to receive his prize he�s captured. | |
Prince John | Archer, I commend you, and because of your skill, you shall get what�s coming to you--- our royal congratulations. |
Robin Hood | Oh, thank you kindly Your Highness. Meeting you face to face your High and Mighty is a real treat. |
Prince John | Release the royal fingers. Aha. And now, I name you the winner, or more appropriately�Prince John tapps him on each shoulder with his sword, causing the disguise to fall away ha, ha� the loser. Seize him. I sentence you to sudden, instant, and even immediate death. The Sheriff and the executioner seized the outlaw and bound him with ropes. Marian pleads for his life in vain |
Maid Marian | Oh no! Oh! Please. Please, Sire. I beg you to spare his life. Please, have mercy. |
Prince John | Dear emotional lady, why should I? |
Maid Marian | Because I love him, Your Highness. |
Prince John | Love him? And does this prisoner return your love? |
Robin Hood | Marian, my darling, I love you more than life itself. |
Prince John | Ah, young love. Your pleas have not fallen upon a heart of stone, but traitors to the Crown must die! |
Robin Hood | That crown belongs to King Richard. Long live King Richard! |
People | Long live King Richard! |
Prince John | Enough! I am King! King! King! Off with his head! |
Maid Marian | Oh no. |
Prince John | Robin�s friends are in despair when suddenly the Prince says Stop! Executioner, stop! Hold your axe! |
Little John | He had quietly put his knife to Prince�s back and forces him to withdraw his orders Okay big show. Tell him to untie my buddy, or I�ll� |
Prince John | Eeek! Sheriff, release my buddy--- I mean, release the prisoner. |
Sheriff | Untie the prisoner? |
Lady Kluck | You heard what he said, Bushel Britches. |
Prince John | Sheriff, I make the rules, and since I�m the headman-to Little John not so hard, you mean thing-Let him go! For heaven�s sakes, let him go! |
Lady Kluck | Yeehee! Love conquers all! |
Robin Hood | I owe my life to you, my darling. |
Maid Marian | I couldn�t have lived without you, Robin. |
Sheriff | Something funny�s going on here. |
Little John | Now P.J. tell Robin to kiss Maid Marian, or you�re my pin cushion |
Sheriff | Why, you� |
Prince John | Kill him! Don�t stand there! Kill him! Robin, Little John and all his friends battle with Prince John and the royal guards. Prince John tries to kill Robin by the back� Don�t hurt me! Help! Help! he runs away and hides� Kill him! |
Lady Kluck | to Marian Run for it, lassie. This is no place for a lady and she fights also as a man Take that, you scoundrel! |
Maid Marian | Help! Robin, Help! |
Robin Hood | he rescues her as a �Tarzan� Marian, madam, will you marry me? |
Maid Marian | Darling, I thought you�d never ask me. But you could�ve chosen a more romantic setting. |
Robin Hood | And for our honey-moon�. London |
Maid Marian | Yes |
Robin Hood | Normady, sunny Spain! |
Maid Marian | Why not? |
Little John | Oh, what a main event this is. What a beautiful brawl. Hey, who�s driving this flying umbrella? |
Robin Hood | We�ll have six children |
Maid Marian | Six?, oh a dozen at least Take that! |
Crocodile | Attention, everyone� |
Prince John | Stop the girl! Ooh! |
Lady Kluck | Take that, you scurvy knave! |
Prince John | Seize the fat one! |
Lady Kluck | Eeeh! Long live King Richard! Yahoo! |
Prince John | Hiss, you�re never around when I need you. |
Sir Hiss | Coming, coming� ha, ha.. For I�m jolly good fellow Hoo, hoo, hoo Oh there you are, old boy. P.J. you won�t believe this but the stork is really Robin Hood. |
Prince John | Robin Hood. Aah! Get out of that if you can. |
Sherwood Forest. We see Robin and Marian in a romantic walk Love it seems like only yesterday you were just a child at play now you�re all grown up inside of me Oh, how fast those moments flee Once we watched a lazy world go by now the days seem to fly Life is brief, but when it�s gone Love goes on and on Ooh, oh, oh, ooh Ohhh, love will live ooh, ooh Love will last Love goes on and on and on Once we watched a lazy world go by Now the days seem to fly Life is brief, but when it�s gone Love goes on and on | |
Maid Marian | Oh, Robin, what a beautiful night! I wish it would never end. |
Friar Tuck | Surprise! Long live Robin hood! Hooray! |
Church Male Mouse | And Long live Maid Marian |
Church Female Mouse | Bravo, bravo! |
People | Hear, hear! Bravo! Bravo! Hooray! |
Lady Kluck | And down with that scurvy Prince John! |
Little John | Yeah! On the world will sing of an English King a thousand years from now and not because he passed some laws or had that lofty brow While bonny good King Richard leads the great Crusade he�s on we�ll all have to slave away for that good-for-nothing John Incredible as he is inept whenever the history books are kept they�ll call him the phony King of England |
Friar Tuck | A pox on the phony King of England |
Little John | He sits alone on a giant throne pretending he�s the king a little tyke who is rather like a puppet on a string and he throws an angry tantrum if he cannot have his way and then he calls from mum while he�s sucking his thumb You see, he doesn�t want to play Too late to be known as John the First he�s sure be to be known as John the Worst a pox on that phony King of England to Alan Lay that country on me, babe |
Lady Kluck | Come on, Johnny. Go, laddie, go |
Little John | While he taxes us to pieces and he robs us of our bread King Richard�s crown keeps slipping down around that pointed head Ah, but while there is a merry man in Robin�s wily pack we�ll find a way to make him pay and steal our money back A minute before he knows we�re there Old Rob�ll snatch his underwear |
People | Ha, ha, ha. Yeah, Bravo, Bravo |
Little John | The breezy and uneasy King of England The sniveling groveling measly, weasly blabberin�, jabberin� gibberin�, jabberin� plunderin�, plottin� Wheelin�, dealin� Prince John that phony King of England Yeah! |
Prince John�s Castle. | |
Sheriff | He throws an angry tantrum If he cannot have his way He calls for mum And sucks his thumb And doesn�t want to play Too late to be known As John the First He�s sure to be known As John the Worst How about that? |
Sir Hiss | That�s P.J. to a �T�. Let me try, let me try. Hoo, hee, hoo Too late to be known As John the First He�s sure to be known As John the Worst--- Prince John opens the door and listens the song. Sir Hiss interrupts it trying to amend the situation The fabulous, marvellous, merciful, chiv--- |
Sheriff | That�s all wrong, Hiss. The sniveling groveling Weasly--- |
Prince John | very angry Enough! |
Sheriff | But Sire, it�s a big hit. The whole village is singing it. |
Prince John | Oh, they are, are they? Well they�ll be singing a different tune. Double the taxes! Triple the taxes! Squeeze every last drop out of those insolent musical peasants! Once again, an enraged Prince John punishes the people with taxes four times greater than before. Soon the prisions are filled with poor people, unable to pay. |
Allan-A-Dale | Man, oh, man. That Prince John sure made good his threat and his helpless subjects paid dearly for his humiliation. Believe me. Taxes, taxes, taxes. He taxed the heart and soul out of the poor people of Nottingham. If you couldn�t pay your taxes, you went to jail. Yep, I�m here, too. Nottingham was in deep trouble. Every town has its ups and downs sometimes ups outnumber the downs but not in Nottingham I�m inclined to believe if we weren�t so down we�d up and leave we�d up and fly if we had wings for flyin� can�t you see the tears we�re cryin� can�t there be some happiness for me not in Nottingham |
Church Male Mouse | Friar Tuck, I don�t think anyone is coming |
Friar Tuck | You�re right Sexton but maybe the sound of this church bell will bring the poor people some comfort. We must do what we can to keep their hopes alive. |
Church Female Mouse | How can there be any hope with that tyrant taxing the heart out of poor people? |
Friar Tuck | Yes, those poor people. Look, our poor box is like our church--- empty. |
Church Female Mouse | Friar Tuck, we�ve saved this. It�s not too much, but please take it for the poor. |
Friar Tuck | Your last farthing? Aw, little sister, no one can give more than that. Bless you both. |
Church Male Mouse | We were saving it for a rainy day. |
Friar Tuck | Well, it�s raining now. Things can�t get worse. |
Sheriff | Howdy, Friar, well I dropped by just in time |
Church Male Mouse | What does that bully want here? |
Church Female Mouse | Father, shh. |
Sheriff | opening the poor box Hmm� well, what have we got here? |
Friar Tuck | Now just a minute Sheriff! That�s the poor box! |
Sheriff | It sure is. I�ll just take it for poor Prince John. Every little bit helps. |
Church Female Mouse | Ooh! You put that back! |
Sheriff | And His Majesty also blesses you little sister. |
Friar Tuck | You thieving scoundrel! |
Sheriff | Now, take it easy. I�m just doing my duty. |
Friar Tuck | Collecting taxes for that arrogant, greedy, ruthless, no-good Prince John? |
Sheriff | Listen Friar, you�re mighty preachy and you�re going to preach your neck right into a hangman�s noose. |
Friar Tuck | Get out of my church! Out! Out! Out! |
Church Female Mouse | Oh, dear me. |
Friar Tuck | If you want taxes� I�ll give you taxes! |
Church Male Mouse | Give it to him, Friar! |
Sheriff | You�re under arrest for high treason to the Crown |
Church Female Mouse | Oh, no. |
Church Male Mouse | Oh, there, there, mother. |
Allan-A-Dale | Every town has its ups and downs sometime ups outnumber the downs but not in Nottingham Prince John announces he will hang Friar Tuck for treason the very next morning. He thinks Robin will go to rescue his friend and then he will be trapped. |
Sir Hiss | Ahem. Sire, if I may--- may venture an opinion. You�re not your usual cheerful, genial self today. I� I know, I know. You haven�t counted your money for days Hmmm? It all makes you so happy. Ahem. Sire� taxes are pouring in, the jail is full, and, oh, I have good news Sire--- Friar Tuck is in jail. |
Prince John | Friar Tuck! It�s Robin Hood I want, you idiot! I�d give all my gold if I just get my hands--- Did you say Friar Tuck? |
Sir Hiss | Did I? Oh, yes I did. |
Prince John | Oh! Yes! I have it! I�ll use that fat friar as bait to trap Robin Hood. |
Sir Hiss | Another trap? |
Prince John | Yes, yes, you stupid serpent. Friar Tuck will be led to the gallows in the village square. |
Sir Hiss | Sire, hang Friar Tuck? A man of the church? |
Prince John | Yes, my reluctant reptile, and when our elusive hero tries to rescue the corpulent cleric�ha, ha, ha, ha my men will be ready. Ha, ha! Jail�s castle. Robin hood enters disguised as a blind beggar. |
Sheriff | Well, Trigger everything�s rigged up and all set. |
Trigger | Yeah, it�s one of the prettiest scaffolds you ever built Sheriff. |
Nutsy | Sheriff, shouldn�t we give that old trap door a test? |
Sheriff | Criminently. Now I know why your mama called you Nusty. |
Robin Hood | Alms. Alms for the poor. Do me old ears hear the melodious voice of the Sheriff? |
Sheriff | Ha, ha. That�s all right, old man. |
Robin Hood | What be going on here? |
Sheriff | We�re hanging Friar Tuck. |
Robin Hood | No! Hang Friar--- Uh, hang Friar Tuck? |
Nutsy | You betcha. At dawn. And maybe it�ll be a double hanging- |
Trigger | Shhh! Dummy up, you dummy. |
Robin Hood | A double hanging, eh? Who be the other one to get the rope? |
Trigger | Sheriff, he�s getting too all-fired nosey |
Robin Hood | I didn�t mean nothing but couldn�t there be trouble if Robin Hood showed up? |
Nutsy | Well, what do you know, sir? Sheriff, he guessed it! Ha, ha. |
Trigger | Nutsy, button your beak. |
Robin Hood | Ah, no need to worry. The Sheriff�ll be too crafty, too clever and too smart for the likes of him, says I. |
Sheriff | Ha, ha. You hear that, Nutsy? For being blind, he sure knows a good man when he sees one, ha, says I. |
Trigger | Sheriff, I�ve still got the think that stupid old codger knows too much. |
Sheriff | Oh shut up, Trigger. He�s just a harmless blind beggar |
Robin Hood | Alms. Alms for the poor. Alms, Alms for the poor. |
Little John | Rob, we can�t let them hang Friar Tuck |
Robin Hood | A jail break tonight is the only chance he�s got. |
Little John | A jail break! There ain�t no way you can get--- |
Robin Hood | I have to get Johnny, or Friar Tuck dies at dawn. |
Jail�s castle at night. Every place is well guarded by the Sheriff�s people. Among them we find Trigger and Nutsy. When Little John is going to kidnap Nutsy� | |
Nutsy | One o�clock! And all�s well! bell tolls three times |
Sheriff | sleepy Nutsy, set your brains ahead a couple of hours. |
Nutsy | Yes sir. Does that there mean adding or subtracting? |
Sheriff | Oh, let�s forget it! |
Nutsy | Yes, sir, Sheriff, sir. |
Sheriff | Nutsy, how can I sleep with you yelling �all�s well� all the time? |
Trigger | Sheriff, everything ain�t all�s well. I got the feeling in my bones there�s gonna be a jailbreak any minute. |
Sheriff | Criminently, Trigger! Point that peashooter the other way. |
Trigger | Don�t you worry not, Sheriff. The safety�s on old Betsy. |
Sheriff | What are you trying to do, you birdbrain? |
Trigger | Just doing my duty, Sheriff. |
Sheriff | Oh, you and that itchy trigger finger of yours. They hear a noise where Nutsy is doing his patrol |
Trigger | Hey, you hear that? |
Sheriff | Sure did I Trigger. There�s something funny going on around here. Come on. You cover me. Wait a minute. Is the safety on old Betsy? |
Trigger | You bet it, Sheriff. |
Sheriff | That�s what I�m afraid of. You go first. All right you in there! Come on with your hands up! |
Trigger | Yeah, reach them up to the sky. |
Robin Hood | Just you watch this performance partner. |
Little John | Be careful, Rob. |
Robin Hood | Jehoshaphat, Trigger. Put that peashooter down. |
Sheriff | Oh, shucks, Trigger. It�s only Nutsy. And criminently! Get back to your patrol. On the double. Get! |
Trigger | I�m a-getting, I�m a-getting |
Sheriff | That Trigger. He�s getting everybody edgy. Nothing�s gonna be happen. That friar will dangle from the gallows come daybreak. |
Robin Hood | Sheriff, why don�t you just sit yourself down here kind of cozy-like? |
Sheriff | Well, thank you, Nutsy. |
Robin Hood | Just close your sleepy little eyeballs. The sandman�s a-coming, why don�t you�let me loosen that belt? Rock-a-bye Sheriff, just you relax |
Sheriff | Oh relax� |
Robin Hood | Di, di, di |
Sheriff | Aw, Nutsy, that�s mighty sweet. Sing it one more time. |
Robin Hood | Rock-a-bye Sheriff, just you relax, dum, pump, pump� Do, do, do, do�. he gives the keys to Little John and they close the door with too much noise |
Trigger | Wait a minute! Jail break! Jail break! I heard it, Sheriff! The door! The door! |
Sheriff | Now, for the last time. No more false alarms. |
Robin Hood | to Little John Now, you release Friar Tuck and the others. I�ll go visit the royal treasury. Inside Little John is looking for Friar Tuck�s cell. |
Friar Tuck | Oh, Little John! It can�t be. |
Little John | Shhh. Quiet.We�re busting out. |
Friar Tuck | Thank God! My prayers have been answered. They both released everybody. |
Skippy | I�m ready. Where�s the bad guys? |
Friar Tuck | Take it easy, son. Cautiously Robin enters in Prince John�s chambers where the Prince and Sir Hiss are snoring in their beds. Bags of gold are everywhere and Robin stealthily removes one by one to the balcony. There he fastens them to the clothesline and then little John reels them toward himself at the window of the jail. |
Prince John | Robin hood! I�ll get even. I�ll get� It�s Robin hood I want. Ha, ha, ha, ha! |
Friar Tuck | Ha, ha. Praise the Lord and pass the taxes rebates! |
Little John | Come on, follow me. When Little John and the others are escaping one of the bags is losing coins awaking the Sheriff but Little John acts quickly. |
Trigger | Sheriff, don�t get your dander up, but I still got a feeling� |
Little John | Friar, get going Hurry! The Friar and the villagers clambered onto a two wheeled cart cross the drawbridge just in time. Prince John and Sir Hiss awake just as Robin fled and Sir Hiss tries to recapture the last bag of gold |
Prince John | Oh, oh, oh, oh ah� Aah! Aah! Hoo! Guards! Guards! My gold! Oh no, no, no! They�re are getting away with my gold. Guards! Guards, to the jail! Rhinos, halt! Stop! Desist! Aah! Ooh! Aah! |
Robin Hood | Everybody, this way! That�s all of them. Get going! |
Little John | This ain�t no hayride, Let�s move! Oh! |
Friar Tuck | On to Sherwood Forest! |
Mother Rabbit | Stop! My baby! |
Tagalong | Mama! Mama! Wait for me! Robin runs for her but the he�s trapped into the castle. |
Sheriff | We got him now! |
Robin Hood | Get going and don�t worry about me. |
Sheriff | This time we got him for sure. he uses a torch as a sword burning the place. Robin tries to escape jumping from the top of the highest tower. The scene is watched by Little John and Skippy |
Prince John | Shoot him! Kill him! Kill him! Robin tries to swim but suddenly he disappears from the others� sight |
Little John | Come on, Rob. Come on. |
Skippy | He�s just got to make it. Only Robin�s hat is in the surface |
Little John | No. No� no. |
Prince John | Yes! He�s finished! Done for! La, la, la! Ha, ha, ha! |
Skippy | He�s going to make it--- isn�t he, Little John? Hey, what�s that? Don�t go! Look it! Look it! we see a reed going to them |
Little John | Hey, what the---- ha, ha, did you have me worried Rob. I thought you were gone. |
Skippy | Ah not Robin Hood. He could�ve swum twice that far, huh, Mr. Robin Hood? |
Sir Hiss | Look, Sire! He�s made it! He got away again. |
Robin Hood & Skippy | A pox on the phony King of England! Oo-da-lolly! |
Prince John | Oh no! It�s so miserably unfair. |
Sir Hiss | I tried to tell you, but no, no, you wouldn�t listen. Your traps never work and now look at your mother�s castle. |
Prince John | Aah! Mommy! |
Sir Hiss | Aah, No! Sire! |
Prince John | You cowardly cobra! |
Sir Hiss | Please! Oh! No! |
Prince John | Procrastinating python! |
Sir Hiss | No! |
Prince John | You aggravating asp! |
Sir Hiss | Saved me! |
Prince John | You eel in snake�s clothing! |
Sir Hiss | Help! |
Prince John | He�s gone stark raving mad! Nottingham village in a sunny and happy day. We see an old reward with a new title: Pardoned by order of King Richard |
Allan-A-Dale | Ha, ha, ha. I thought we�d never get rid of those three rascals but lucky for us folks, King Richard returned and well he just straightened everything out. We see Prince John, Sir Hiss and the Sheriff working in the Royal Rock Pile |
Prince John | Oooh! Aah! Oooh! Oooh! Ouch! Oooh! |
Sir Hiss | Ha, ha. Church�s bell�s tolling |
Allan-A-Dale | Say, we�d better get over the church, it sounds like somebody�s getting hitched. |
People | Long live Robin Hood! Maid Marian kiss Robin and they both smile happily Long live King Richard! |
King Richard | Oh, Friar Tuck. It appears that I have an outlaw for an in-law. Ha, ha, ha. |
Friar Tuck | Ha, ha. Not bad. |
Toby | Gee, Skippy, how come you�re going? |
Skippy | Well, Robin Hood will have kids so somebody�s got to keep all right things. |
Little John | Ho! |
Lady Kluck | Ach! I�ve never been so happy. |
Nutsy | Hey, here comes the bride, Trigger! Present� arms! again the safety of old Betsy doesn�t work |
Allan-A-Dale | Well, folks, that�s the way it really happened. Love goes on and on OO-da-lolly Oo-da-lolly Golly what a day OO-da-lolly Oo-da-lolly Golly what a day |