ssscript.com

Dale	Ya know. There�s been a heap of legends and tall tales about Robin Hood, all different too. Well, we folks of the animal kingdom have our own version. It�s the story of what really happened in Sherwood Forest. Alan starts whistling meanwhile in the screen all the actors are going be introduced Incidentally, I�m Allan-A-Dale, a minstrel. That�s an early folk singer, and my job is to tell it like it is... or was... or whatever... Robin Hood and Little John Walkin� through the forest Laughin� back and forth at what the Other�ne has to say Reminiscin� this �n that �n havin� Such a good time Oo-de-lally, hoo-de-lally, golly What a day! Never ever thinkin� there was Danger in the water They were drinkin�, they just Guzzled it down Never dreamin� that a schemin� Sheriff and his posse Was a watchin� them and Gatherin� around Robin Hood and Little John Runnin� through the forest Jumpin� fences, dodgin� trees And tryin� to get away Contemplatin� nothin� but escape And fin�ly makin� it Oo-de-lally, hoo-de-lally, golly What a day! Oo-de-lally, hoo-de-lally, golly What a day!
Little John	You know somethin�, Robin? You�re taking too many chances.
Robin Hood	Chances! You must be joking! That was just a bit of a lark Little John.
Little John	Yeah? Take a look at your hat. Robin finds an arrow has impaled it That�s not a candle on a cake.
Robin Hood	Hello, this one almost had my name on it, didn�t it? They�re getting better, you know. You�ve got to admit it, they are getting better.
Little John	Uh, yeah. The next time, that sheriff will probably have a rope around our necks. Ugh! Pretty hard to laugh hanging there, Rob.
Robin Hood	The Sheriff and his whole posse couldn�t lift you off the ground, and en garde! He throws the arrow to Little John
Little John	Hey watch out Rob, that�s the only hat I�ve got.
Robin Hood	Oh, come along. You worry too much old boy.
Little John	You know something, Robin? I was just wondering, are we good guys or bad guys? You know, I mean, out robbing the rich to feed the poor�
Robin Hood	Rob? That�s a naughty word. We never rob; we just sort of borrow a bit from those who can afford it.
Little John	Borrow! Boy, are we in debt.
Bugle sounds
Robin Hood	Ha, ha. That sounds like another collection day for the poor, eh, Johnny boy?
Little John	Yeah. Sweet charity!
It�s the royal entourage, and Prince John is in the carriage. With him is his chief adviser, Sir Hiss. Between the two of them they have put a heavy burden of taxes on the poor people. They are making their way through Sherwood Forest on the way to Nottingham to tax the people there
Prince John	Taxes! Taxes! Beautiful, lovely taxes! Aha! Aha!
Sir Hiss	Sire, you have an absolute skill for encouraging contributions from the poor.
Prince John	To coin a phrase dear counsellor, rob the poor to feed the rich Am I right? Tell me, what�s the next stop, sir Hiss?
Sir Hiss	Let me see� Reading a map Ooh. The next stop is Nottingham, Sire.
Prince John	Oh, the richest plum of them all. Notting-ha-ha-ham the crown is too big for his head
Sir Hiss	A perfect fit, Sire. Most becoming. You look regal, dignified, sincere, masterful, noble, chivalry�
Prince John	Don�t overdo it, Hiss. There. That, I believe, does it. This crown gives me a feeling of power. Power! Forgive me a cruel chuckle. Ha, ha, ha, ha! Power, mmm.
Sir Hiss	How well King Richard�s crown sits on your noble brow
Prince John	Doesn�t it? Angrily King Richard? I�ve told you never to mention my brother�s name!
Sir Hiss	A mere slip of the forked tongue, Majesty. We�re in this plot together, if you don�t mind my saying so, and remember it was your idea I hypnotized him�
Prince John	I know, and sent him off on that crazy crusade. Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Sir Hiss	Much to the sorrow of the Queen Mother.
Prince John	crying Mother! Mother always did like Richard best he sucks one of his fingers while with the other hand takes the ear
Sir Hiss	Your Highness, please, don�t do that. If you don�t mind my saying so, you see, you have a very loud thumb. Hypnotism can rid you of your psychosis-s-s -s-s-o-o-o-o- e-e-easily.
Prince John	No! None of that!
Sir Hiss	I was only trying to help.
Prince John	I wonder. Silly serpent.
Sir Hiss	Silly serpent?
Prince John	Look here. One more, one more hiss out of you�uhh� Hiss, and you are walking to Nottingham.
Sir Hiss	to himself Snakes don�t walk. They slither. Humph, so there.
Robin and Little John quickly slipped into disguises as gypsies fortune tellers and run ahead to the side of the road
Little John	What a bad luck. It�s only a circus. A peanut operation.
Robin Hood	Peanuts, says you? Dunce, that�s the royal coach! It�s Prince John himself.
Little John	The Prince? Wait a minute! There�s a law against robbing royalty. I�ll catch you later.
Robin Hood	What? And miss this chance to perform before royalty?
Little John	Ah! Here we go again.
Prince John stops his convoy and permits Robin Hood and Little John to kiss his hands, during which process large quantities of finger-jewellery disappear. Sir Hiss spots this, but the King silences his protests.
Robin Hood	Oo-da-lolly, oo-da-lolly! Fortune tellers!
Little John	Fortunes forecast! Lucky charms!
Robin Hood	Get the dope with your horoscope!
Prince John	Fortune tellers! How droll! Stop the coach.
Sir Hiss	Sire, Sire, they may be bandits.
Prince John	Oh, poppycock. Female bandits? What next? Rubbish! To Robin and Little John disguised as gypsies My dear ladies, you have my permission to kiss the royal hands� whichever you like, first Robin and Little John see only the jewels in them
Robin Hood	Mmm. Oh how gracious! And generous he steals one of the rings
Sir Hiss	Sire, sire, did you see what they�
Prince John	Stop hissing in my ear. Meanwhile Little John kiss the other hand and takes with him the jewels
Sir Hiss	G-g-g-gee�
Prince John	Aah! Hiss! Oh, you�ve hissed your last� hiss. Suspicious snake.
Robin Hood	Masterfully done, Your Excellency. Now close your eyes and concentrate. Close your eyes. Tight shut. No peeking, Sire. Ooh! From the mists of time, come forth, spirits. Yoo-hoo!
Little John	outside Little John is preparing the trick of the crystal ball Ok, little fireflies. Glow, babies, glow!
Robin Hood	We�re waiting! Ahh-ohh! Look Sire. Look.
Prince John	Ah! Incredible! Floating spirits!
Robin Hood	Ah. Oh�naughty, naughty. You mustn�t touch.
Prince John	Oh, you struck the royal hand.
Robin Hood	Shhh! You�ll break the spell. Gaze into the crystal ball. Oo-da-lolly. Oo-da-lolly... Oh! A face appears... A crown is on his noble brow.
Prince John	Oo-da-lolly he sees himself A crown! How exciting!
Robin Hood	His face is handsome, regal, majestic� lovable, a cuddly face.
Prince John	Handsome, regal, majestic�lovable. Yes, yes. Cuddly. Ha ha ha. That�s me to a �T�, clearly is. And then, Robin tries to catch one of the taxes bags, but Sir Hiss stops him
Robin Hood	Ooh! Uh�
Prince John	Now what?
Robin Hood	chuckling Why, uh� I see, um� your illustrious name�
Prince John	I know my name! Get on with it!
Robin Hood	Your name will go down� down� down� He tries to get out Sir Hiss� tail the money bag in history, of course.
Prince John	I knew it! You hear that, Hiss? Oh you can�t� He�s in the basket. Don�t forget it.
Outside, Little John sees that the wheels� hub caps are made of gold�
Little John	Hmm. What have we here? Solid gold hub caps. He robs them Oo-da-lolly. The jackpot! He makes a hole in the bottom of the box and all the coins are putting in his dress. But when Robin and Little John run away in different ways they bump
Prince John	Robbed! I�ve been robbed! Hiss, you�re never around when I need you! Sir Hiss goes out of the basket I�ve been robbed.
Sir Hiss	Of course you�ve been robbed
Robin Hood	Oo-da-lolly! Oo-da-lolly!
Little John	Fortunes forecast. Lucky charms.
Prince John	After them, you fools! The entourage run after them, but the wheels have been robbed also, and Prince John falls on the ground No, no, no, no!
Sir Hiss	I knew it, I knew it! I just knew this would happen. I warned you, but you wouldn�t listen. Ah, ah, ah. Seeing that Prince John is going to use the mirror he tries to warn him seven years bad� He breaks the mirror on Sir Hiss� head luck. That�s what it is. Besides, you broke your mother�s mirror.
Prince John	Ohh, Mommy! He sucks his thumb as a baby I�ve got a dirty thumb.
Nottingham. Prince John was furious upon discovering that he had been tricked, and when he arrived at Nottingham he wanted revenge. Rewards were posted for the capture of the thieves, but of course, the pair remained free.
Allan-A-Dale	Well even Prince John offered a reward for the capture of Robin Hood that sure rogue kept on robbing the rich to feed the poor, and blame me if it�s a good thing he did, �cause the taxes on all the poor folks of Nottingham were starving to death. Uh-oh. Here comes old bad news himself� the Honourable Sheriff of Nottingham.
Sheriff	Every town Has its taxes too And the taxes is due Doo dee doo doo doo Well, lookie there. Friar Tuck, the old do-gooder. He�s out doing good again.
Otto	Well, good morning, Friar Tuck.
Friar Tuck	Shhhh. For you, Otto, from Robin Hood.
Otto	Oh, God bless Robin Hood.
Sheriff	Doo da doo doo doo knocking the door
Friar Tuck	It�s the Sheriff! Hurry. Hide it, quick!
Sheriff	Here I come, ready or not! Well, greetings from your friendly neighbourhood tax collector
Otto	Oh, take it easy on me Sheriff. What with this busted leg, you know, I-I�m way behind in me work, Sheriff.
Sheriff	I know, but you�re way behind with your taxes too.
Friar Tuck	OH, have a heart, Sheriff! Can�t you see he�s laid up? Come on, Otto, it�s better sit down and rest.
Otto	Oh thank you again while he walks we can hear coins jingling
Sheriff	Let me give you a hand with that leg. Oh. Upsy-daisy. Bingo! What they won�t think of next he hits the foot
Otto	Ooooh! Ooooh!
Sheriff	It smarts, don�t it? I know, but Prince John says taxes should hurt.
Friar Tuck	Now see here, you-you evil, flint hearted---
Sheriff	Now, now, now. Save your sermon, preacher. It ain�t Sunday, you know. Doo da doo doo doo They call me a slob But I do my job Doo da doo doo doo
He arrives at Rabbit�s home, where they are in a birthday party
Rabbits	Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you Happy birthday dear Skippy He receives his gift
Sheriff	Happy birthday to you. Well, sonny, that box is done up right pretty, ain�t it?
Skippy	Well, Mr. Sheriff, sir, it�s my birthday present, sir.
Sheriff	It sure is. Why, don�t you open it?
Skippy	Oh boy! One whole farthing! The Sheriff takes it first
Mother Rabbit	Have you no heart? We all scrimped and saved to give it to him.
Sheriff	Now, that�s mighty thoughty of you, wider-woman. The family that saves together, pays together. Skippy is crying Oh now, don�t take it so hard, sonny. Prince John wishes you a happy birthday too.
A blind beggar appears at the home begging for alms
Robin Hood	as a blind Alms, alms, alms for the poor
Sheriff	Hmmm. Well�. The Sheriff swipes his meagre collection too So far, it�s been a cheerful morning. Keep saving!
Mother Rabbit	What a dirty trick! You poor old man. Do come in. Come in and rest yourself.
Robin Hood	Thank you kindly, mother. Thank you. Tell me now, did me old ears hear someone singing a birthday ditty?
Skippy	crying Yes sir. And that mean old Sheriff took my birthday present.
Robin Hood	There, there, now. Be a stout hearted lad. Don�t let it get you down the beggar reveals himself as Robin hood, and gives Skippy a bow-and-arrow and a Robin Hood hat for his birthday
Skippy	Gee! It�s Robin Hood!
Robin Hood	Happy birthday son!
Sis	Oh, he�s so handsome. Just like his reward posters.
Robin Hood	Tell me young man, how old are you today?
Skippy	Gosh! I�m seven years old going to eight.
Robin Hood	Seven? Well, that makes you man of the house, and I�ve got just the right present for you,
Skippy	For me? Gee, thanks, Mr. Robin Hood, sir. Hey, how do I look?
Tagalong	Not much like Mr. Robin Hood.
Robin Hood	She�s right. There is something missing. Of course! There you go.
Skippy	Oh boy! Now how do I look?
Sis	laughing The hat�s too big.
Mother Rabbit	Shhh. Mind your manners.
Tagalong	imitating her mother Yes. Mind your mattles.
Robin Hood	Ha, ha. Don�t worry. You�ll grow into it, young man.
Skippy	I�m going to try it out.
Tagalong	Goodbye Mr. Robin Hood. Come again, on my birthday.
Mother Rabbit	Oh, you have made his birthday a wonderful one. How can I ever thank you?
Robin Hood	I wish I could do more, he gives her a bag of money on general principles. Here. Now keep your chin up. Someday there�ll be happiness again in Nottingham. You�ll see.
Mother Rabbit	Robin Hood, you risk so much to keep our hopes alive. Bless you, bless you.
A bunch of kids -Skippy, Toby Turtle, Sis and Tagalong- are getting off to play with the bow-and-arrow. Skippy fires the arrow and it lands in the grounds of Nottingham Castle where Maid Marian and Lady Kluck are playing badminton.
Toby	Gee, Robin Hood really gave it to you?
Skippy	Yeah, and he gave me his hat too.
Toby	His hat too! May I shoot your bow?
Tagalong	Let me try Skippy.
Skippy	Oh no, you�re not, I�m shooting it first.
Sis	Your pointing too high.
Skippy	I�m not either. Watch this.
Toby	Oh, oh. Now you done it.
Sis	Right in Prince John�s backyard.
Tagalong	Skippy you can�t go in there.
Toby	Yeah. Prince John will chop off your head. Like this.
Skippy	I don�t care. I gotta get my arrow.
Sis	Wait a minute. Toby might tattle on you.
Skippy	Yeah, Toby you got to take the oath.
Toby	An oath?
Tagalong	Put your hand on your heart and cross your eyes.
Skippy	Spiders, snakes and a lizard�s head�
Toby	Spiders, snakes and a lizard�s head�
Skippy	If I tattle-tale, I�ll die till I�m dead.
Toby	If I tattle-tale, I�ll die till I�m dead.
Lady Kluck	Now it�s your turn to serve, Marian dear.
Maid Marian	Are you ready Lady Kluck?
Lady Kluck	Oh, as your lady in waiting, I�m waiting. Ho, ho, ho. I�m getting too old for this.
Maid Marian	Oh, Klucky that was a good shoot.
Lady Kluck	Not bad yourself, dear. Oh, my girdle�s killing me
Maid Marian	Where is it?
Lady Kluck	It must be in there someplace.
Maid Marian	Oh, Klucky you look so silly. Oh, look. There it is, behind you. Oh! She faces to Skippy Well, hello. Skippy is petrified Where did you come from?
Skippy	Please, don�t tell Prince John. Mama said he�ll chop off my head.
Maid Marian	Oh, don�t be afraid. You�re doing nothing wrong.
Lady Kluck	Oh Marian, what a bonny wee bunny.
Maid Marian	Who does this young archer remind you of?
Lady Kluck	Oh! Well, upon my word! The notorious Robin Hood!
Maid Marian	That�s right. Only Robin Hood wears a hat like that.
Skippy	more confident now Look at this keen Robin Hood bow.
Tagalong	Ah-choo!
Lady Kluck	joking Oh, Marian, don�t look around, but I do believe we�re surrounded. Oh mercy!
Sis	He snitched on us.
Maid Marian	It�s all right children. Don�t be afraid, Come here.
Toby	to Sis Do you think it�s safe?
Tagalong	That�s Maid Marian.
Sis	Mama said she�s awful nice. Come on.
Tagalong	Hey you guys. Not so fast. Wait for me.
Sis	I told Skippy was shooting too high.
Maid Marian	I�m so very glad he did. Now I get to meet all of you.
Tagalong	Gee, you�re very beautiful.
Sis	Are you gonna marry Robin Hood?
Tagalong	Mama says you and Robin Hood are sweethearts.
Maid Marian	Well� um�, you see, that was several years ago before I left for London
Toby	Did he ever kiss you?
Maid Marian	Well no, but he carved our initials on this tree. I remember it so well.
Skippy	You are going to have any kids?
Tagalong	My mum has some kids.
Maid Marian	Oh, he�s probably forgotten all about me
Skippy	Oh not Robin Hood. I�ll bet he�ll storm the castle, fight the guards, rescue you and drag you off to Surest Forest.
Lady Kluck	Now, just a moment there, young man. You�ve forgotten Prince John.
Skippy	Prince John don�t scare me none.
Toby	I�m scared of Prince John. He�s cranky.
Lady Kluck	Heh, heh, heh using her racket as a sword I, Prince John, challenge you to a duel! Hey, hey Take that, and that, and this.
Skippy	Death to tyrants!
Lady Kluck	Ach! Ach! Ach! �running for her live�
Sis	Slice him to pieces!
Maid Marian	Oh, save me, my hero! Save me!
Lady Kluck	Oh! Ouch! That�s not fair! Mommy! She sucks her thumb as Prince John does
Sis	That�s Prince John all right.
Skippy	Yahoo! Now I got you!
Lady Kluck	Ach. Mercy, mercy. She takes the wooden sword and acts as if she was bounded Ugh. He got me. I�m dying.
Skippy	worried Did I hurt you, huh?
Lady Kluck	No, this is the part where you drag your lady fair off the Sherwood Forest.
Skippy	Come on lady fair, let�s go.
Maid Marian	Oh, Robin! You�re so brave and impetuous. Oh, so this is Sherwood Forest.
Skippy	Yeah, I guess so. And now what will we do?
Maid Marian	Well, usually, the hero gives his lady a kiss.
Skippy	A kiss? Oh, that�s sissy stuff.
Maid Marian	Well if you won�t then I will.
Sis	They�re kissing Ha, ha, ha. Laughing Ah�
Maid Marian�s room. She is truly yearning for Robin Hood.
Lady Kluck	Ah me. Young love. Oh it�s a grand thing.
Maid Marian	Oh Klucky, surely he�s not known how much I still love him.
Lady Kluck	But of course, my dear. Believe me, someday soon your uncle King Richard will have an outlaw for an in-law.
Maid Marian	laughing Oh Klucky, but when?, when?
Lady Kluck	Patience, my dear, patience. Remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Maid Marian	sadly Or forgetful. Oh, I�ve been away so long. What if he�s forgotten all about me?
Sherwood Forest. Robin Hood is cooking the meal, dreaming about her�
Robin Hood	La, da, di, da, da, da, di, da, dum Da, da, hm, hm, hm, hm
Little John	Hey lover boy, how�s that grub coming? Man I�m starved.
Robin Hood	Hm, hm, hm, da, da, dee
Little John	Rob?
Robin Hood	Hm, hm, hm
Little John	Robin?
Robin Hood	Hm, hm, hm
Little John	Robaire. Hey!
Robin Hood	What? What do you say?
Little John	Ah forget it. Your mind�s not on food. You�re thinking about somebody with long eyelashes. You�re smelling that sweet perfume.
Robin Hood	Hey, whoa, it�s boiling over.
Little John	You�re burning the chow!
Robin Hood	Sorry, Johnny. I was thinking about Maid Marian again. I can�t help it. I love her Johnny.
Little John	Hey look, why don�t you stop mooning and moping around? Just marry the girl.
Robin Hood	Marry her? You don�t just walk up to a girl under a bookcase and say, �Remember me? We were kids together, will you marry me�? No it isn�t just done that way.
Little John	Oh, come on Robby. Climb the castle walls. Sweep her off her feet. Carry her off in style.
Robin Hood	It�s no use Johnny. As I told you it just wouldn�t work. Besides, what can I offer her?
Little John	Well, for one, you can�t cook.
Robin Hood	I�m serious. She�s a high born lady of quality.
Little John	So she�s got class, So what?
Robin Hood	I�m an outlaw. That�s what. That�s no life for a lovely lady, always on the run. What kind of a future is that?
Friar Tuck	For heaven�s sake, son. You�re not an outlaw. Why, someday you�ll be called a great hero.
Robin Hood	A hero? Do you hear that Johnny? We�ve just been pardoned.
Little John	Ho, ho, that�s a gas. We ain�t been arrested yet.
Friar Tuck	All right. Laugh you rogues, but there�s going to be a big to-do in Nottingham He tastes the �food� Well-done, ain�t it? Old Prince John�s having a championship archery tournament tomorrow.
Little John	Archery tournament? Rob could win that standing on his head, eh Rob?
Robin Hood	Thank you Little John, but I�m sure we�re not invited.
Friar Tuck	No, but there�s somebody who�ll be very disappointed if you don�t come.
Little John	Yeah. Old Bushel Britches--- the Honourable Sheriff of Nottingham.
Friar Tuck	No. to Robin Maid Marian.
Robin Hood	Maid Marian?
Friar Tuck	Yeah. She�s going to give a kiss to the winner.
Robin Hood	A kiss to the winner? Oo-de-lolly! Come on Johnny! What are we waiting for?
Little John	Wait a minute, Rob. That place will be crawling with soldiers.
Robin Hood	Aha! But remember, faint hearts never won fair lady. Fear not my friends. This will be my greatest performance.
Nottingham. Archery performance�s day. The archery tournament is a plot. Sir Hiss is intent on catching Robin Hood. The very best archers of England had come to this shooting match and they gathered in the great tent, inspecting their bows and arrows and talking of the good shots they had made in their day.
Prince John	Hiss, this is a red-letter day. A �coup d�etat� to coin a Norman phrase.
Sir Hiss	Yes, indeed, Sire. Your plan to capture Robin Hood in public is sheer genius. Hoo, hoo, hoo!
Prince John	Hiss, no one sits higher than the King. Must I remind you, Hiss? Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.
Sir Hiss	Do forgive me. I didn�t mean�
Prince John	My trap is baited and set. And then, revenge! Ah, revenge!
Sir Hiss	Shhh. Not so loud, Sire. Remember, only you and I know, and your s-s-secret is my s-s-secret.
Prince John	Stop hissing in my ear. Secret? What secret?
Sir Hiss	The capture of Robin Hood, Sire.
Prince John	That insolent blackguard. Ooh! I�ll show him who wears the Crown.
Sir Hiss	I share your loathing, Sire. That scoundrel fooled you with that silly disguise, then robbed you, making you look utterly ridiculous.
Prince John	Enough! Hiss, you deliberately dodged.
Sir Hiss	But, but--- but Sire� please.
Prince John	Stop snivelling and hold still.
Sir Hiss	Thank you Sire.
Maid Marian	Klucky I�m so excited. But how will I recognize him?
Lady Kluck	Uh, he�ll let you know somehow. That young rogue is full of surprises, my dear.
Robin Hood	There she is, Little John. Isn�t she beautiful?
Little John	Cool it, lover boy. Your heart�s running away with your head.
Robin Hood	Oh stop worrying. This disguise would fool my own mother.
Little John	Aha, but your mom ain�t here. You got to fool old Bushel Britches.
Robin Hood	Sheriff, Your Honour. Meetin� you face to face is a real treat. A real treat.
Sheriff	Well, now thank you. Oh excuse me. I gotta go win this tournament.
Little John	Hey, Rob�s not a bad actor, but wait till he sees this scene. I lay on Prince John. Ah�.me Lord, my esteemed Royal Sovereign of the Realm, the head man himself, you�re beautiful.
Prince John	Ha, ha. He has style, eh, Hiss? �Du savoir faire il y a n�est ce pas�, Hiss?
Little John	Took the words from my mouth, P.J.
Prince John	P.J.! I like that. You know I do. Hiss, put it on my luggage. P.J. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! P.J., yes.
Sir Hiss	Humph! And you, who might you be, sir?
Little John	I am Sir Reginald, Duke of Chutney. And don�t stick your tongue out at me, kid. And now, Your Mightiness, allow me to lay some protocol on you he�s going to kiss his hand but�
Prince John	Oh, no. Forgive me, but I lose more jewels that way. Please, sit down.
Little John	Thanks P.J. Nothing better than the royal box. Oh, hey! Hey, what�s this? Oh, excuse me buster
Sir Hiss	Buster? You, sir, have taken my seat.
Prince John	Hiss, with you around, who needs a court jester? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Now get out there and sep your snake eyes open for you-know-who.
Sir Hiss	You--- you mean I--- I�m being dismissed?
Little John	You heard his Mightiness. Move it, creepy. Get lost. Be gone, long one.
Sir Hiss	What cheek! Creepy. Buster. Long one! Who�s that duke think he is?
Allan-A-Dale	He�s up to something.
Friar Tuck	Yeah. Come on.
Sir Hiss buys a balloon and floats skyward attached to it. Friar Tuck shoots Sir Hiss out of the skies by firing an arrow from a mandolin-string and stuffs him into a beer-barrel.
Robin Hood	Ah, Your Ladyship. I beg your pardon; it�s a great honour to shoot for the favour of a lovely lady like yourself. Hope I win the kiss.
Maid Marian	Oh! Well, thank you my thin-legged archer. I wish you luck whispering with all my heart.
Sir Hiss	Hmmmm. I wonder�
Crocodile	Your Highness, with your Royal permission, we�re ready to begin.
Prince John	Proceed, Captain.
Crocodile	The Tournament of the Golden Arrow will now begin.
The archers start shooting; among them there�s Toby�s father.
Toby	Yay, dad.
People	When the Sheriff shoots�. Boo! Boo! Boo! And when the Stork -i.e. Robin- shoots� Yay! Yay! Yay!
Prince John	A perfect bull�s-eye! Well, well.
Little John	That�s what you call pulling it back and letting it go, P.J.
Robin Hood	I�m gonna win that golden arrow and present myself to the lovely Maid Marian�
Sheriff	Listen Scissorsbill, if you shoot as good as you blabbermouth you�re better than Robin Hood.
Robin Hood	Robin Hood, he says! Wow-wee! I�m tiptop, all right but I�m not as good as he is.
Little John	Ha, ha! That kid�s got class, ain�t he, P.J.?
Prince John	Indeed, he has, Reggie. Ha, ha! Bravo! Bravo! Yes.
Robin Hood	Oh� by the way, I hear you�re having a little bit trouble getting your hands on that Robin Hood.
Sheriff	He�s scared of me. Now I told you. He didn�t show up here today. I can spot him through them phoney disguises.
Sir Hiss	It�s him! It�s Robin Hood! I can�t wait till I tell His Majesty. Unhand me, you�. Please, please, I don�t drink.
Crocodile	Attention everyone. The final contestants are� the Honourable Sheriff of Nottingham�
People	Boo! Boo! Boo!
Crocodile	and the spindle-legged stork from Devonshire.
People	Yay! Yay! Yay!
Prince John	My dear, I suspect you favour the gangly youth. Hm?
Maid Marian	Me? Uh� Why, yes Sire. Well, at least he amuses me.
Prince John	Coincidentally, my dear young lady, he amuses me, too. Ha, ha, ha, ha.
Crocodile	For the final shootout, move the target back 30 paces.
Sheriff	You heard him, Nutsy. Keep going. Move it, you birdbrain whispering And remember what you�re supposed to do.
Nutsy	Yes sir, Sheriff, sir. When the Sheriff shoots he jumps and the arrow is in the target�s centre
People	Boo! Boo! Boo!
Sheriff	Well, that shot wins the golden arrow, the kiss and the whole caboodle Although the Sheriff tries to fiddle the Stork, he fails�
People	Yay! Yay! Yay!
Prince John makes a signal to the Captain and when the Stork goes confidentially up to the royal platform to receive his prize he�s captured.
Prince John	Archer, I commend you, and because of your skill, you shall get what�s coming to you--- our royal congratulations.
Robin Hood	Oh, thank you kindly Your Highness. Meeting you face to face your High and Mighty is a real treat.
Prince John	Release the royal fingers. Aha. And now, I name you the winner, or more appropriately�Prince John tapps him on each shoulder with his sword, causing the disguise to fall away ha, ha� the loser. Seize him. I sentence you to sudden, instant, and even immediate death. The Sheriff and the executioner seized the outlaw and bound him with ropes. Marian pleads for his life in vain
Maid Marian	Oh no! Oh! Please. Please, Sire. I beg you to spare his life. Please, have mercy.
Prince John	Dear emotional lady, why should I?
Maid Marian	Because I love him, Your Highness.
Prince John	Love him? And does this prisoner return your love?
Robin Hood	Marian, my darling, I love you more than life itself.
Prince John	Ah, young love. Your pleas have not fallen upon a heart of stone, but traitors to the Crown must die!
Robin Hood	That crown belongs to King Richard. Long live King Richard!
People	Long live King Richard!
Prince John	Enough! I am King! King! King! Off with his head!
Maid Marian	Oh no.
Prince John	Robin�s friends are in despair when suddenly the Prince says Stop! Executioner, stop! Hold your axe!
Little John	He had quietly put his knife to Prince�s back and forces him to withdraw his orders Okay big show. Tell him to untie my buddy, or I�ll�
Prince John	Eeek! Sheriff, release my buddy--- I mean, release the prisoner.
Sheriff	Untie the prisoner?
Lady Kluck	You heard what he said, Bushel Britches.
Prince John	Sheriff, I make the rules, and since I�m the headman-to Little John not so hard, you mean thing-Let him go! For heaven�s sakes, let him go!
Lady Kluck	Yeehee! Love conquers all!
Robin Hood	I owe my life to you, my darling.
Maid Marian	I couldn�t have lived without you, Robin.
Sheriff	Something funny�s going on here.
Little John	Now P.J. tell Robin to kiss Maid Marian, or you�re my pin cushion
Sheriff	Why, you�
Prince John	Kill him! Don�t stand there! Kill him! Robin, Little John and all his friends battle with Prince John and the royal guards. Prince John tries to kill Robin by the back� Don�t hurt me! Help! Help! he runs away and hides� Kill him!
Lady Kluck	to Marian Run for it, lassie. This is no place for a lady and she fights also as a man Take that, you scoundrel!
Maid Marian	Help! Robin, Help!
Robin Hood	he rescues her as a �Tarzan� Marian, madam, will you marry me?
Maid Marian	Darling, I thought you�d never ask me. But you could�ve chosen a more romantic setting.
Robin Hood	And for our honey-moon�. London
Maid Marian	Yes
Robin Hood	Normady, sunny Spain!
Maid Marian	Why not?
Little John	Oh, what a main event this is. What a beautiful brawl. Hey, who�s driving this flying umbrella?
Robin Hood	We�ll have six children
Maid Marian	Six?, oh a dozen at least Take that!
Crocodile	Attention, everyone�
Prince John	Stop the girl! Ooh!
Lady Kluck	Take that, you scurvy knave!
Prince John	Seize the fat one!
Lady Kluck	Eeeh! Long live King Richard! Yahoo!
Prince John	Hiss, you�re never around when I need you.
Sir Hiss	Coming, coming� ha, ha.. For I�m jolly good fellow Hoo, hoo, hoo Oh there you are, old boy. P.J. you won�t believe this but the stork is really Robin Hood.
Prince John	Robin Hood. Aah! Get out of that if you can.
Sherwood Forest. We see Robin and Marian in a romantic walk Love it seems like only yesterday you were just a child at play now you�re all grown up inside of me Oh, how fast those moments flee Once we watched a lazy world go by now the days seem to fly Life is brief, but when it�s gone Love goes on and on Ooh, oh, oh, ooh Ohhh, love will live ooh, ooh Love will last Love goes on and on and on Once we watched a lazy world go by Now the days seem to fly Life is brief, but when it�s gone Love goes on and on
Maid Marian	Oh, Robin, what a beautiful night! I wish it would never end.
Friar Tuck	Surprise! Long live Robin hood! Hooray!
Church Male Mouse	And Long live Maid Marian
Church Female Mouse	Bravo, bravo!
People	Hear, hear! Bravo! Bravo! Hooray!
Lady Kluck	And down with that scurvy Prince John!
Little John	Yeah! On the world will sing of an English King a thousand years from now and not because he passed some laws or had that lofty brow While bonny good King Richard leads the great Crusade he�s on we�ll all have to slave away for that good-for-nothing John Incredible as he is inept whenever the history books are kept they�ll call him the phony King of England
Friar Tuck	A pox on the phony King of England
Little John	He sits alone on a giant throne pretending he�s the king a little tyke who is rather like a puppet on a string and he throws an angry tantrum if he cannot have his way and then he calls from mum while he�s sucking his thumb You see, he doesn�t want to play Too late to be known as John the First he�s sure be to be known as John the Worst a pox on that phony King of England to Alan Lay that country on me, babe
Lady Kluck	Come on, Johnny. Go, laddie, go
Little John	While he taxes us to pieces and he robs us of our bread King Richard�s crown keeps slipping down around that pointed head Ah, but while there is a merry man in Robin�s wily pack we�ll find a way to make him pay and steal our money back A minute before he knows we�re there Old Rob�ll snatch his underwear
People	Ha, ha, ha. Yeah, Bravo, Bravo
Little John	The breezy and uneasy King of England The sniveling groveling measly, weasly blabberin�, jabberin� gibberin�, jabberin� plunderin�, plottin� Wheelin�, dealin� Prince John that phony King of England Yeah!
Prince John�s Castle.
Sheriff	He throws an angry tantrum If he cannot have his way He calls for mum And sucks his thumb And doesn�t want to play Too late to be known As John the First He�s sure to be known As John the Worst How about that?
Sir Hiss	That�s P.J. to a �T�. Let me try, let me try. Hoo, hee, hoo Too late to be known As John the First He�s sure to be known As John the Worst--- Prince John opens the door and listens the song. Sir Hiss interrupts it trying to amend the situation The fabulous, marvellous, merciful, chiv---
Sheriff	That�s all wrong, Hiss. The sniveling groveling Weasly---
Prince John	very angry Enough!
Sheriff	But Sire, it�s a big hit. The whole village is singing it.
Prince John	Oh, they are, are they? Well they�ll be singing a different tune. Double the taxes! Triple the taxes! Squeeze every last drop out of those insolent musical peasants! Once again, an enraged Prince John punishes the people with taxes four times greater than before. Soon the prisions are filled with poor people, unable to pay.
Allan-A-Dale	Man, oh, man. That Prince John sure made good his threat and his helpless subjects paid dearly for his humiliation. Believe me. Taxes, taxes, taxes. He taxed the heart and soul out of the poor people of Nottingham. If you couldn�t pay your taxes, you went to jail. Yep, I�m here, too. Nottingham was in deep trouble. Every town has its ups and downs sometimes ups outnumber the downs but not in Nottingham I�m inclined to believe if we weren�t so down we�d up and leave we�d up and fly if we had wings for flyin� can�t you see the tears we�re cryin� can�t there be some happiness for me not in Nottingham
Church Male Mouse	Friar Tuck, I don�t think anyone is coming
Friar Tuck	You�re right Sexton but maybe the sound of this church bell will bring the poor people some comfort. We must do what we can to keep their hopes alive.
Church Female Mouse	How can there be any hope with that tyrant taxing the heart out of poor people?
Friar Tuck	Yes, those poor people. Look, our poor box is like our church--- empty.
Church Female Mouse	Friar Tuck, we�ve saved this. It�s not too much, but please take it for the poor.
Friar Tuck	Your last farthing? Aw, little sister, no one can give more than that. Bless you both.
Church Male Mouse	We were saving it for a rainy day.
Friar Tuck	Well, it�s raining now. Things can�t get worse.
Sheriff	Howdy, Friar, well I dropped by just in time
Church Male Mouse	What does that bully want here?
Church Female Mouse	Father, shh.
Sheriff	opening the poor box Hmm� well, what have we got here?
Friar Tuck	Now just a minute Sheriff! That�s the poor box!
Sheriff	It sure is. I�ll just take it for poor Prince John. Every little bit helps.
Church Female Mouse	Ooh! You put that back!
Sheriff	And His Majesty also blesses you little sister.
Friar Tuck	You thieving scoundrel!
Sheriff	Now, take it easy. I�m just doing my duty.
Friar Tuck	Collecting taxes for that arrogant, greedy, ruthless, no-good Prince John?
Sheriff	Listen Friar, you�re mighty preachy and you�re going to preach your neck right into a hangman�s noose.
Friar Tuck	Get out of my church! Out! Out! Out!
Church Female Mouse	Oh, dear me.
Friar Tuck	If you want taxes� I�ll give you taxes!
Church Male Mouse	Give it to him, Friar!
Sheriff	You�re under arrest for high treason to the Crown
Church Female Mouse	Oh, no.
Church Male Mouse	Oh, there, there, mother.
Allan-A-Dale	Every town has its ups and downs sometime ups outnumber the downs but not in Nottingham Prince John announces he will hang Friar Tuck for treason the very next morning. He thinks Robin will go to rescue his friend and then he will be trapped.
Sir Hiss	Ahem. Sire, if I may--- may venture an opinion. You�re not your usual cheerful, genial self today. I� I know, I know. You haven�t counted your money for days Hmmm? It all makes you so happy. Ahem. Sire� taxes are pouring in, the jail is full, and, oh, I have good news Sire--- Friar Tuck is in jail.
Prince John	Friar Tuck! It�s Robin Hood I want, you idiot! I�d give all my gold if I just get my hands--- Did you say Friar Tuck?
Sir Hiss	Did I? Oh, yes I did.
Prince John	Oh! Yes! I have it! I�ll use that fat friar as bait to trap Robin Hood.
Sir Hiss	Another trap?
Prince John	Yes, yes, you stupid serpent. Friar Tuck will be led to the gallows in the village square.
Sir Hiss	Sire, hang Friar Tuck? A man of the church?
Prince John	Yes, my reluctant reptile, and when our elusive hero tries to rescue the corpulent cleric�ha, ha, ha, ha my men will be ready. Ha, ha! Jail�s castle. Robin hood enters disguised as a blind beggar.
Sheriff	Well, Trigger everything�s rigged up and all set.
Trigger	Yeah, it�s one of the prettiest scaffolds you ever built Sheriff.
Nutsy	Sheriff, shouldn�t we give that old trap door a test?
Sheriff	Criminently. Now I know why your mama called you Nusty.
Robin Hood	Alms. Alms for the poor. Do me old ears hear the melodious voice of the Sheriff?
Sheriff	Ha, ha. That�s all right, old man.
Robin Hood	What be going on here?
Sheriff	We�re hanging Friar Tuck.
Robin Hood	No! Hang Friar--- Uh, hang Friar Tuck?
Nutsy	You betcha. At dawn. And maybe it�ll be a double hanging-
Trigger	Shhh! Dummy up, you dummy.
Robin Hood	A double hanging, eh? Who be the other one to get the rope?
Trigger	Sheriff, he�s getting too all-fired nosey
Robin Hood	I didn�t mean nothing but couldn�t there be trouble if Robin Hood showed up?
Nutsy	Well, what do you know, sir? Sheriff, he guessed it! Ha, ha.
Trigger	Nutsy, button your beak.
Robin Hood	Ah, no need to worry. The Sheriff�ll be too crafty, too clever and too smart for the likes of him, says I.
Sheriff	Ha, ha. You hear that, Nutsy? For being blind, he sure knows a good man when he sees one, ha, says I.
Trigger	Sheriff, I�ve still got the think that stupid old codger knows too much.
Sheriff	Oh shut up, Trigger. He�s just a harmless blind beggar
Robin Hood	Alms. Alms for the poor. Alms, Alms for the poor.
Little John	Rob, we can�t let them hang Friar Tuck
Robin Hood	A jail break tonight is the only chance he�s got.
Little John	A jail break! There ain�t no way you can get---
Robin Hood	I have to get Johnny, or Friar Tuck dies at dawn.
Jail�s castle at night. Every place is well guarded by the Sheriff�s people. Among them we find Trigger and Nutsy. When Little John is going to kidnap Nutsy�
Nutsy	One o�clock! And all�s well! bell tolls three times
Sheriff	sleepy Nutsy, set your brains ahead a couple of hours.
Nutsy	Yes sir. Does that there mean adding or subtracting?
Sheriff	Oh, let�s forget it!
Nutsy	Yes, sir, Sheriff, sir.
Sheriff	Nutsy, how can I sleep with you yelling �all�s well� all the time?
Trigger	Sheriff, everything ain�t all�s well. I got the feeling in my bones there�s gonna be a jailbreak any minute.
Sheriff	Criminently, Trigger! Point that peashooter the other way.
Trigger	Don�t you worry not, Sheriff. The safety�s on old Betsy.
Sheriff	What are you trying to do, you birdbrain?
Trigger	Just doing my duty, Sheriff.
Sheriff	Oh, you and that itchy trigger finger of yours. They hear a noise where Nutsy is doing his patrol
Trigger	Hey, you hear that?
Sheriff	Sure did I Trigger. There�s something funny going on around here. Come on. You cover me. Wait a minute. Is the safety on old Betsy?
Trigger	You bet it, Sheriff.
Sheriff	That�s what I�m afraid of. You go first. All right you in there! Come on with your hands up!
Trigger	Yeah, reach them up to the sky.
Robin Hood	Just you watch this performance partner.
Little John	Be careful, Rob.
Robin Hood	Jehoshaphat, Trigger. Put that peashooter down.
Sheriff	Oh, shucks, Trigger. It�s only Nutsy. And criminently! Get back to your patrol. On the double. Get!
Trigger	I�m a-getting, I�m a-getting
Sheriff	That Trigger. He�s getting everybody edgy. Nothing�s gonna be happen. That friar will dangle from the gallows come daybreak.
Robin Hood	Sheriff, why don�t you just sit yourself down here kind of cozy-like?
Sheriff	Well, thank you, Nutsy.
Robin Hood	Just close your sleepy little eyeballs. The sandman�s a-coming, why don�t you�let me loosen that belt? Rock-a-bye Sheriff, just you relax
Sheriff	Oh relax�
Robin Hood	Di, di, di
Sheriff	Aw, Nutsy, that�s mighty sweet. Sing it one more time.
Robin Hood	Rock-a-bye Sheriff, just you relax, dum, pump, pump� Do, do, do, do�. he gives the keys to Little John and they close the door with too much noise
Trigger	Wait a minute! Jail break! Jail break! I heard it, Sheriff! The door! The door!
Sheriff	Now, for the last time. No more false alarms.
Robin Hood	to Little John Now, you release Friar Tuck and the others. I�ll go visit the royal treasury. Inside Little John is looking for Friar Tuck�s cell.
Friar Tuck	Oh, Little John! It can�t be.
Little John	Shhh. Quiet.We�re busting out.
Friar Tuck	Thank God! My prayers have been answered. They both released everybody.
Skippy	I�m ready. Where�s the bad guys?
Friar Tuck	Take it easy, son. Cautiously Robin enters in Prince John�s chambers where the Prince and Sir Hiss are snoring in their beds. Bags of gold are everywhere and Robin stealthily removes one by one to the balcony. There he fastens them to the clothesline and then little John reels them toward himself at the window of the jail.
Prince John	Robin hood! I�ll get even. I�ll get� It�s Robin hood I want. Ha, ha, ha, ha!
Friar Tuck	Ha, ha. Praise the Lord and pass the taxes rebates!
Little John	Come on, follow me. When Little John and the others are escaping one of the bags is losing coins awaking the Sheriff but Little John acts quickly.
Trigger	Sheriff, don�t get your dander up, but I still got a feeling�
Little John	Friar, get going Hurry! The Friar and the villagers clambered onto a two wheeled cart cross the drawbridge just in time. Prince John and Sir Hiss awake just as Robin fled and Sir Hiss tries to recapture the last bag of gold
Prince John	Oh, oh, oh, oh ah� Aah! Aah! Hoo! Guards! Guards! My gold! Oh no, no, no! They�re are getting away with my gold. Guards! Guards, to the jail! Rhinos, halt! Stop! Desist! Aah! Ooh! Aah!
Robin Hood	Everybody, this way! That�s all of them. Get going!
Little John	This ain�t no hayride, Let�s move! Oh!
Friar Tuck	On to Sherwood Forest!
Mother Rabbit	Stop! My baby!
Tagalong	Mama! Mama! Wait for me! Robin runs for her but the he�s trapped into the castle.
Sheriff	We got him now!
Robin Hood	Get going and don�t worry about me.
Sheriff	This time we got him for sure. he uses a torch as a sword burning the place. Robin tries to escape jumping from the top of the highest tower. The scene is watched by Little John and Skippy
Prince John	Shoot him! Kill him! Kill him! Robin tries to swim but suddenly he disappears from the others� sight
Little John	Come on, Rob. Come on.
Skippy	He�s just got to make it. Only Robin�s hat is in the surface
Little John	No. No� no.
Prince John	Yes! He�s finished! Done for! La, la, la! Ha, ha, ha!
Skippy	He�s going to make it--- isn�t he, Little John? Hey, what�s that? Don�t go! Look it! Look it! we see a reed going to them
Little John	Hey, what the---- ha, ha, did you have me worried Rob. I thought you were gone.
Skippy	Ah not Robin Hood. He could�ve swum twice that far, huh, Mr. Robin Hood?
Sir Hiss	Look, Sire! He�s made it! He got away again.
Robin Hood & Skippy	A pox on the phony King of England! Oo-da-lolly!
Prince John	Oh no! It�s so miserably unfair.
Sir Hiss	I tried to tell you, but no, no, you wouldn�t listen. Your traps never work and now look at your mother�s castle.
Prince John	Aah! Mommy!
Sir Hiss	Aah, No! Sire!
Prince John	You cowardly cobra!
Sir Hiss	Please! Oh! No!
Prince John	Procrastinating python!
Sir Hiss	No!
Prince John	You aggravating asp!
Sir Hiss	Saved me!
Prince John	You eel in snake�s clothing!
Sir Hiss	Help!
Prince John	He�s gone stark raving mad! Nottingham village in a sunny and happy day. We see an old reward with a new title: Pardoned by order of King Richard
Allan-A-Dale	Ha, ha, ha. I thought we�d never get rid of those three rascals but lucky for us folks, King Richard returned and well he just straightened everything out. We see Prince John, Sir Hiss and the Sheriff working in the Royal Rock Pile
Prince John	Oooh! Aah! Oooh! Oooh! Ouch! Oooh!
Sir Hiss	Ha, ha. Church�s bell�s tolling
Allan-A-Dale	Say, we�d better get over the church, it sounds like somebody�s getting hitched.
People	Long live Robin Hood! Maid Marian kiss Robin and they both smile happily Long live King Richard!
King Richard	Oh, Friar Tuck. It appears that I have an outlaw for an in-law. Ha, ha, ha.
Friar Tuck	Ha, ha. Not bad.
Toby	Gee, Skippy, how come you�re going?
Skippy	Well, Robin Hood will have kids so somebody�s got to keep all right things.
Little John	Ho!
Lady Kluck	Ach! I�ve never been so happy.
Nutsy	Hey, here comes the bride, Trigger! Present� arms! again the safety of old Betsy doesn�t work
Allan-A-Dale	Well, folks, that�s the way it really happened. Love goes on and on OO-da-lolly Oo-da-lolly Golly what a day OO-da-lolly Oo-da-lolly Golly what a day